First of All... Eat a D*ck - The No-Nonsense Personalized Keychain

And because we know you're a unique individual with your own special brand of "first of all," the back of this keychain can be personalized! Add your name, a sassy quote, or a reminder to always "stay true to yourself" (even when you're telling people to... well, you know).

Why you absolutely NEED this keychain:

• Hilariously Blunt: Because sometimes you just need to say what everyone's thinking (but maybe too polite to say out loud).
• Personalization Power: Make it uniquely yours! (Keep it sassy-ish, folks.)
• Stainless Steel Strength: Tough enough to survive your most "first of all" moments.
• Perfect Gift for Your Equally Blunt Friends: Spread the joy! (And maybe a little bit of chaos.)
• Conversation Starter: Prepare for knowing nods, shared eye rolls, and maybe a few high-fives.
• Shiny and Distracting: Keeps you entertained while waiting for... well, anyone who needs a little "first of all" in their life.
• Great Gifting Idea: Perfect for birthdays, holidays, or just because your friend needs a little reminder to stand their ground.

Order now and let your keys speak your mind! (And maybe find them more often.)

These long rectangle with heart cut stainless steel key chains are laser engraved which means the design will not rub away or fade. Made for years and years of use.

The thick engraved stainless steel blank measures 2 x .5 inches. It is securely attached to a stainless steel round one inch key ring.

The back of the key chain can be engraved with your own message, names and/or dates. There is not a character limit on text but keep in mind the more wording the smaller the font keep to just a couple shorter lines.

These make great stocking stuffers and gifts as well as for school banquets, secret santa and promotional giveaways. Email us about quantity discounts.

If you do not see what you are looking for drop us an email and we would love to work with you on a design.